Meet Lala Sorenson
I’m a civil engineer, leadership coach, and founder of Own the CHAIR™.
For over 16 years, I’ve worked in technical environments across the Philippines and the United States—leading complex projects and cross-functional teams.
Along the way, I saw something early:
Strong work isn’t always what gets recognized.
What makes the difference is whether you can say what needs to be said—and how it’s received.
That’s the work I do now.
The Unwritten Rules
In one interview, I asked a simple question:
“How many women are on your engineering team?”
The interviewer paused.
“You know engineering is a male-dominated industry, right?”
That moment didn’t tell me everything—but it confirmed something I was already experiencing.
The environment wasn’t always set up with women in mind.
If you’re a woman in STEM, you’ve likely felt this:
Being capable isn’t always enough.
To be seen as credible—or promotable—you’re often expected to do more.
To adjust.
To fit expectations that weren’t designed for you.
You’re told to:
speak up more
be more visible
be more confident
But no one shows you how to do that in a way that actually works—
in your environment, with real stakes.
The Turning Point
Early in my career, I stayed in a company where most new hires didn’t last.
Leadership relied on intimidation.
I told myself staying meant I was strong.
That pushing through meant I was resilient.
But the stress was changing me. I was getting sick—physically and mentally.
That’s when something clicked:
What I thought was strength… was often fear.
Fear of speaking up.
Fear of asking for more.
Avoiding conversations because they felt risky.
That week, I made a different decision.
I updated my resume.
And I started having the conversations I had been avoiding.
In interviews, I spoke directly about my work and what I was capable of.
Within days, I had an offer—
a stronger role, better environment, and higher compensation.
What I Learned the Hard Way
Even after that, the same pattern showed up.
I was passed over for promotion more than once.
Not because I wasn’t capable—
but because I hadn’t learned how to clearly communicate my work
or handle the conversations that influence decisions.
So I started speaking up.
Not perfectly.
Sometimes at a cost.
But I kept going.
Because I knew my work mattered—and it needed to be recognized.
What Changed
Over time, something shifted.
I became more direct about what I wanted.
I stopped waiting to be recognized.
I started saying it—clearly.
And when the environment didn’t support my growth, I moved.
To roles with:
more responsibility
better alignment
significantly higher compensation
I also navigated:
changing industries
returning after a career break
learning to lead as an introvert
None of it was easy.
It required me to:
get clear on what I wanted
trust my decisions
say what mattered—even when it felt uncomfortable
Growth didn’t come from becoming someone else.
It came from seeing myself clearly—and acting on it.
The Pattern I Keep Seeing
As I shared my experience, I started hearing the same thing from other women.
Highly capable.
Often outperforming their peers.
Still overlooked.
Not because they weren’t good enough.
But because of:
unspoken expectations
conflicting standards
and how their communication was being received
They were navigating a constant contradiction:
Be visible—but not too much.
Speak up—but not too directly.
Be confident—but not be labeled difficult.
I started working with them informally.
And I saw something shift.
They had the conversations they had been avoiding.
They made clearer decisions.
They spoke more directly.
And things started to move.
Not because they became someone different—
but because they stopped holding back when it mattered
The Work I Do Now
That’s when it became clear to me:
The issue isn’t capability.
It’s what happens in the moment
when you know what needs to be said—but don’t say it.
Today, I work with mid-to-senior women in STEM to handle high-stakes conversations—so they can say what needs to be said, be taken seriously, and move things forward.
This isn’t about scripts.
Or becoming someone else.
It’s about:
understanding what’s getting in the way
working through it
and saying what matters clearly and directly
Own The CHAIR
I built Own the CHAIR™ for this reason.
Because you’re already doing the work.
This is about making it count.
You don’t need to become someone else to move forward.
You need to see yourself clearly—
and say what needs to be said from that place.