Own The Chair · Decision-Cost Analysis

Thinking about quitting your job? Pause here first.

Maybe you're working too much. Maybe the work stopped meaning anything, or you go whole days without a real connection with the people around you. You've updated your resume and gone to interviews, and nothing has landed. And with the economy the way it is, leaving feels risky, but staying feels heavy.

If that's you, you're not ungrateful and you're not failing. You're tired, and you want more from your work. That's worth listening to. This short exercise gives you a strategy to clear your mind and make a better decision before you send that "I quit" email.

Why the urge to quit feels so urgent

When work feels like a constant threat, with too much to do, too little meaning and no one in your corner, your brain reacts as if you're in danger. It goes into one of three survival modes:

Fight

You snap in meetings, replay arguments on the drive home and feel resentment building.

Flight

You scroll job boards at midnight and daydream about handing in your notice tomorrow.

Freeze

You feel numb and stuck. You can't focus or decide, so nothing changes and you feel worse.

An urgent need to quit is usually a stress response, not a decision. Wait until you're thinking clearly before you act on it.

3 mistakes people make when deciding to quit

1

Deciding on your worst day

A decision made in fight, flight or freeze is about escaping a feeling, not building a future.

2

Leaving before you've asked

Many people quit over things they never asked to change: workload, role, flexibility or support.

3

Seeing only two options

"Stay and suffer" or "leave and risk it all." In reality, you have more than two.

Consider other options

1

Leave well

Find a better job and leave on your terms, moving toward something you want, not just away from what isn't working. This is the ideal.

2

Wait with a plan

Stay for now, with a timeline, a savings goal and a search plan. Waiting becomes a strategy, not a sentence.

3

Lower the risk where you are

Ask for specific changes, like a lighter workload, more flexibility or a different project, to make your current job easier to stay in while you decide.

Want to quit? PHASE™ it.

The goal: PHASE™ your way to a clear next step

Instead of reacting, you'll move through five steps. Your answers save automatically in this browser and only you can see them.

P

Pause

What's happening right now?

Before deciding anything, take an honest look at where you are. How satisfied are you with each part of your current job?

H

Hear

Listen to what's underneath

When your job doesn't meet your expectations, it's completely normal to want something different. And most of us already know what we really want. The hard part is the asking.

Asking can feel risky. We worry it will damage our credibility, strain a relationship, or end in rejection. But those fears are usually a product of our beliefs and assumptions: "They'll think I can't handle it." "Asking will only make it worse." "I'm not good enough to ask for more."

The same fears follow us into job interviews. When we're on high alert, worried about saying the wrong thing or not being enough, we don't think straight, and it's hard to show up with the confidence that reflects what we can really do.

Underneath it all, the root cause is usually the same: we don't fully trust ourselves, our decisions, or our ability to handle whatever may come.

The good news is that self-trust isn't something you're born with. It's a skill you can learn, and it serves you well beyond your job. It helps you build better relationships, find more happiness and fulfillment in work and life, handle stress better, and much more.

A

Analyze

Weigh the costs and benefits

Fill in the boxes in number order, 1 to 4. Be specific, and consider both the short-term and long-term costs and benefits.

1

What does this job give me right now?

3

What is staying costing me? What are the disadvantages?

4

What would I need to give up, compromise on or overcome?

2

What could be possible for me if I leave?

Look at the columns: boxes 1 and 4 are your reasons to stay. Boxes 3 and 2 are your reasons to go.

–

S

Strategize

Get clear before you plan

A good strategy depends on the quality of your analysis and the information behind it. That's where focused, strategic questions help. The right questions bring clarity, challenge your beliefs and assumptions, and open up options and solutions you may not have seen. For example:

  • What matters most to you in your next job?
  • What are you willing to compromise on?
  • What skills and strengths do you already have that you can rely on during this transition?
  • What could you do to make your finances more stable?

Once you're clear on what you know and what matters most, you can build a strategy that's aligned with your goal.

E

Execute

Follow through with self-trust

A plan only works if you can keep moving when it gets uncomfortable: when an interview goes quiet, when your manager says no, when the doubt comes back at 2 a.m. This is where you rely on self-trust, trusting your strengths and your ability to handle whatever comes.

Self-trust also means trusting yourself to adjust. When something isn't working, you can recognize it and change your plan, without seeing it as failure or starting over from doubt.

Think of the leaders who stay calm and present even when the stress is very high. They still feel the pressure. The difference is that they know how to manage the energy drainers that pull them into reaction, and how to tap into the energy boosters when they need them.

Drained by worry and what-ifs55%
Fully present100%

We're at the top of our game when we bring 100% of our energy to the task and the decision in front of us.

Transitions, whether in life or in your career, are never easy. Your brain goes on high alert, scanning for risk, and your whole body responds. Understanding how your thoughts and mind react under stress is critical to finding the strategy that works specifically for you. You don't have to figure this out alone.

How career and transition coaching can help

This taster gave you a glimpse. Coaching is a space to think, brainstorm and find solutions that are true to you. Here, we go through each step of PHASE™ with your real situation. Together, we'll work through focused, empowering questions to surface what is really driving your decision, the beliefs and assumptions holding you back, and options you may not have considered on your own.

What's possible when we work together

  • P

    Pause: from reacting to respondingInstead of making a big decision on your worst day, you feel calmer, think more clearly and get back a sense of control over your work and your life.

  • H

    Hear: from holding back to understanding what's in the wayA deeper understanding of the beliefs, assumptions and fears that hold you back from trusting yourself, and strategies to take away their power.

  • A

    Analyze: from fog to clarityYou gather the right information, tell real risks from assumed ones and see your options clearly. You understand your energy drainers and have strategies to manage them, so you can show up fully and confidently.

  • S

    Strategize: from stuck to a clear way forwardYou know your next move and why it's right for you, and you can tap into the energy boosters that align with your strengths and values, so you can keep your energy, engagement and performance high, even under stress.

  • E

    Execute: from doubting yourself to trusting yourselfYou trust yourself to make the decision and handle whatever comes, stay calm and present under pressure, and bring your full energy to your work, your decision and your life.

The skills you learn go beyond one decision. You leave with a repeatable process and greater self-trust that not only help with your next move, but also help you become a better leader and reach your full potential at work.

Book a free clarity call. Bring your answers from this page, and together we'll explore which path works best for your current situation.

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